Humblebrag alert – I was fortunate to have my garden featured on the Fine Gardening “Garden Photo of the Day” blog today. You can see it here. The comments from the readers are above and beyond and I truly appreciate the feedback knowing how much effort I’ve put into my garden. The years of blood and sweat and stitches and ticks and sketches and research and frustration and false elation is all worth it.
But I feel uncomfortable with the praise at the same time.
As I mentioned in a recent post, I’ve been all in on Instagram of late and enjoy how easy it is to share photos and interact with other hardcore plant freaks, not to mention the creativity involved with the pics themselves. I enjoy tinkering with various filters and the macro capabilities through my phone are even better than what I can do with my “real” camera. I’ve received great advice and wonderful feedback on Instagram and again, it is affirmation that I must be doing something right.
But now I suffer from Insta-Guilt.
If others only knew how rough a good portion of my garden looks, they may second guess their praise. It’s so easy to take bits and pieces of the garden and mash them together to make it look like it is magazine worthy. Is it our/my responsibility to paint a more realistic picture of what goes into creating and maintaining a garden? In doing so, does that put other gardeners, especially newbies, at ease and allow them to push on without the thought that they may have a black thumb? This is a question I’ve been chewing on for years and I’m still not sure what the right answer is.
On the flip side, do people simply want to escape when they are scrolling through Instagram photos? Do most enjoy thumbing through 50 photos in 30 seconds with the occasional click of the heart as a “like”? Is it not the right place to expose reality and the ugly underbelly of gardening life?
Like everything in life, does the answer fall somewhere in between the two extremes? Relish in the beauty that is nature and that is plants but keep it all in check by throwing in a dash of “what can go wrong” or “here is what powdery mildew looks like”.
Here’s a real life example.
You cannot deny the beauty of the blooms on this Dwarf Sneezeweed.
“Wow“, John Q Reader says, “I need to get me some of these.” And he does just that and sticks them in the ground and waits for those perfect blooms and the perfect looking plant.
Except he wakes up one day and sees this.
He then curses himself, labels himself as a non-green-thumb and potentially gives up on gardening. A bit extreme? I guess so, but where does the responsibility lie with telling him that this is super common with Sneezeweed? The seller? That will never happen if they hope to stay in business so does it then shift to those of us who write about plants? Me thinks so. Maybe it is “yes these blooms are beautiful but you better make sure you hide their potentially ugly legs by planting something smaller in front of it.”
Example number 2.
Bee balm blooms are exceptional and plenty in summer and do they ever draw in the bees and butterflies.
But buyer beware, the foliage will more than likely suffer from powdery mildew and things can get ugly real fast.
I’ve done a decent job of exposing my garden warts from the inception of this blog back in 2010, but it was always done in more of a comical tone with self-deprivation. I don’t know that I’ve been direct enough in doling out “what can go wrong”.
When the narrative of a blog post takes me there going forward, I really want to focus on highlighting the flaws of a plant or where mistakes can easily be made. This includes really exposing my garden and what it really looks like. A step back from the close-up shots is necessary. It may hurt to be so honest but I think it will pay dividends in the long run.
QOTD – do you agree with my assessment of a more realistic view of our gardens is needed?
You will be performing a heroic act of public service if you go with the warts and all expose’ approach. I’m not sure if any purple hearts of valor will be arriving in the mail but it will be appreciated…at least, by this reader. It’s helpful to know the potential downside of a particular plant and how to manipulate its use to its best advantage. I’m always interested in reading other people’s opinions when discussion in the comment’s section takes place. I’m also very interested if a plant just hits that sweet spot where there’s nothing to complain about. Like…I’m wondering if the wondrous Veronica ‘Royal Candles’ looks awful at some point? I know you cut it back after the first flush to get a second round of bloom but what does it look like in late Sept.?
Thanks Michaele. ‘Royal Candles’ is hurting right now and due for an aggressive cut-back. They’ve always rebloomed after the shearing and in fact, i’ll do it again in late summer for one last fludh of bloom, albeit small.
Part of the beauty/agony of gardening is in the learning. I have probably killed just as many plants as I now have flourishing.
It’s all a part of the process.
But, when you get it right…celebrate!!!
Be proud.
Thanks so much Jeff. I love the process more than anything else, you nailed it.
I tend to agree with your assessment John, for the QOTD!
It would be helpful to know the down-side of a plant before purchase, but the experience
of experimentation can have its rewards too!
Like your attitude Jeff P. 🙂
Amen Deborah. Hopefully I can bring that to the table moving forward. Thank you.
I love it! I have matching thumbs….ones green the other is black. We are dealing with living things. It happens. Love your blog!
Thank you Brooke! I think I may have the same matching thumbs too, it is a battle of who ultimately wins out.
I really appreciate seeing the good, the bad and the ugly side of gardening. Gardening magazines and catalogs show the pretty side of gardening, but hardly ever go into details about what can go wrong. I have always found that a bit frustrating. Watching your garden develop, warts and all, really helps to inspire and encourage me since many of my gardening plans don’t always work the way I dreamed they would. Watching a pro go through challenges helps me to feel that maybe I’m not a total failure at it and that even great gardeners have setbacks. I’ve learned a lot from following your blog and look forward to reading your posts. In today’s busy world, I know that it is not easy to find time to put together a post, especially detailed instructional posts such as yours, so thank you for your contribution to the gardening world! 🙂
This comment made my day! Cannot tell you enough how much I appreciate those words. Grats.
Ah, yes, I’m right there with you this morning.
Right away it brought to mind a quote by May Sarton (1912-1995), a coastal Maine poet and gardener:
A garden is a series of losses set against a few triumphs, like life itself.
Words to live by for me!!
Keep up the good slog!
Thanks for sharing, I need this hanging somewhere where I can see it all day. Truly words to live by.
Any gardener/photographer knows how to frame their photo to eliminate the telephone pole, chewed up leaves or weedy area. My vote is for the lovely and perfect. Gives me something to strive for, even if I know in my heart “the rest of the story”. If I want reality I can just go out in my own garden. Now excuse me while I look through my own photographs of my once in a while perfect garden. In time I will forget the not so perfect parts that were lurking near by.
Thanks Alice! Great point how gardeners of different experience/skill levels interpret things so much differently. A happy medium seems to be the way to go.
jmarkowski–
Excellent essay!! And excellent question. I’m a new follower of your blog, and really look forward to reading more. Everything you mention is truth, and yes I do think the answer is to be very honest in our writings about plants. I happen to be in the landscaping trade myself, and people often have different expectations than reality. What slowly brings them around is the actual experience of gardening. My most realistic clients have been gardeners themselves. What I do every day can be so hard because of the EDUCATION that people must get, often from me. And people do not value gardening, or value the art of it, or value the design of their outdoor spaces, or value/understand the expense of maintenance. When I’ve gone to a culture that DOES value these things (England, Japan), what a huge difference!! It is not a fight every day. People are already there.
But–back to your post–there’s also the part about being intimidated. Yes PHOTOGRAPHS are one single slice or snippet of life–one extremely small second of time. It is unfair to compare our gardens to these things. Yet they are so inspirational! What better “ahhhhh” feeling of respite from your crazy day, to view a beautiful photograph. (People just DO NOT understand how much $$ and effort went into that one little snippet that is so beautiful.)
Gardens are a perishable product. If they are not maintained regularly, they dimish–boom!–with amazing speed. Six months or a year later, it could be a completely different garden. This is so much true, in fact, that I believe a garden cannot survive the passing of its gardener. It is a living, breathing thing, with the soul and spark of the human that creates it. The spirit of that garden perishes when the gardener is gone. Or it changes, if a new gardener comes on the scene.
Wow, got pretty deep there! Guess I’ve got something to say! All I mean is that often people don’t “get” it , when it comes to gardens, in this culture. Yet it is a VERY worthy goal to help them to “get” it. And that INCLUDES your posting of beautiful pictures. More glory to you! Please do it without guilt. And later, in your “full disclosure” in your blogs–you are doing fine, fine, fine. There is a GREAT deal to teach here. You cannot change the world in a day.
You are doing a great job.
Alyse
Alyse – welcome and thanks so much for finding your way here! Your comment is spot on and one I’ll keep reading for a long time coming. I could almost break it down into multiple upcoming posts from intimidation to garden as perishable to trying to change the storyline. Thank you so much for taking the time to craft this comment and hope we can chat more in the future.
Nice! So true. All wonderful!
I say we all have enough “weeds” in our lives, so why concentrate on the bad stuff and not on the good stuff?
A great point of view Glory. Maybe it is all about the perfect balance, whatever that is.